Welcome to Wisdom Wednesday
Feeling and believing that we are broken or don’t measure up in some way…that we are flawed…inadequate…and in need of fixing…is an illusion. You are not broken. Perfection is a fantasy. As human beings we have the ability to see, to conceptualize, a more perfect something. It’s an ability that drives us to create and learn and explore. We’ve begun to use this ability to destroy ourselves.
I don’t believe we were born to exploit ourselves or each other, and yet, that is exactly the nature of the life in which we believe ourselves to be trapped. It’s no different from living in a cult. Our culture is a cult. Think of it. Think about how hard it is to go against the norm. We believe in many ways that we are powerless. We are powerless only insofar as we believe we have no choice.
It always comes down to the freedom of choice and seeing our choices clearly. To see them, we must begin to question. We must ask ourselves, and ask often, what do we value? Do our thoughts, beliefs and actions line up? Why do we choose to believe that we are less than? Why do we choose to believe we need fixing? We are not broken.
[tweetthis]When we are locked within an illusion, our choices are less visible to us, and we feel powerless. #abuse[/tweetthis]
You are not broken.
We are inundated by messages from a culture that needs us to believe that we are lacking. It wants you to believe you are broken and in need of what they are selling. To the degree that we are buying into what we are being told, we are allowing ourselves to be victimized by the culture we live in. The first step we can make as individuals is to begin to see the illusion, then we can exercise our choice. Each time we choose to step outside of the illusion and refuse to buy into the mindset that we are lacking, the stronger we become. The stronger we become, the crazier the illusion appears, the easier it is to choose to believe we are not broken.
Life is not easy. In fact, it’s really, really hard sometimes, but one of the biggest deterrents to our sense of well-being is buying into and living within the illusion that we need to be fixed. We create more misery for ourselves by fighting with who and what we are, than any external event that comes into our lives. We are exhausted and without resources to cope with life’s misfortunes. The mental gymnastics brought on by living within the illusion deplete us and create a life that feels unbearable.
You are not broken. You, like the rest of us are on a journey of discovery, of learning and growing and exploring. If you are here you are probably on a journey that calls you to dig deeper and to explore what is most essential in life…what is most valuable…what is worth living and dying for. Life itself is the universe’s gift to us. It is up to us value it properly and stop believing that we are broken.
COMING SOON!!
A new eBook/workbook to guide you through the steps necessary to break free from this cycle of illusion and self-condemnation. Be sure to add your name to my mailing and/or stay connected on Facebook/Twitter.
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Wise words, Dorothy! And I especially love the Hawking quote! Thank you.
Thank you, for stopping by!
Thank you Dorothy. I wish I had known this 43 years ago when I felt I had done something wrong, (or not done something right) and that it was all my fault that my new husband told me he loved me, but loved someone else more. He left me to marry her. Something MUST be wrong with me! I blamed myself for years until I found out they had known each other before I ever met him, and reconnected after she found out he had gotten married to me. I am not broken and don’t need to be fixed. I am a whole person with or without a particular person in my life. Thank you for bringing up a topic that all women can weigh in on with their own stories of feeling broken for whatever reason.
I hear you, Celia! When we are young we are particularly prone to blaming ourselves. I did the same sort of thing. The experiences we have in our early love relationships can set many false beliefs into motion, that can take a lifetime to untangle. We are so impressionable! Particularly, if our childhoods have been less than loving. Women have also been prone to looking for a partner to complete them. We are most complete when we are connected to ourselves. Thank you so much for sharing a bit of your story! You are right, it is a topic women can relate to. I sure can!
Thank you for this amazing piece. I really resent entities that capitalize on insecurities of women. I am in my first years of menopause- I feel like more of a woman then ever, this may sound odd. I think the bottom line of cursing the way age looks and feels comes from fear of death. I admit, I am terrified of death and menopause is making it real. At least I know that covering my grey and trying to pretend my body is not changing will have absolutely no effect…
Isn’t it ironic? Feeling more like a woman as we age? I have had the same experience. I agree, the fear of death is a big issue and it is also something we talk very little about. We don’t know what we think, feel or believe and it’s terribly frightening to live with the unknowing. How do we face the difficulties we are sure to face with each passing year, without any sense of security? I have wrestled with these questions for the last decade and suspect I will continue to search for answers. I have found greater understanding and acceptance with each passing day. There’s wisdom to be gained in these years, valuable wisdom and I will continue to share what I have learned as I know I am not alone in my questioning and dis-ease. I am so glad you took the time to leave a comment. The conversation and dialogue is an invaluable part of the journey.
This is a powerful piece. It’s so true and sad that society benefits from keeping us feeling low and less than. What you said about the energy we deplete by trying not to be ourselves is something I continue to grapple with to this day. I’m sick of feeling like I can’t be myself. Why is the world like this? It’s as if evil is winning. Maybe we are letting it by believing the illusion.
It’s an ongoing challenge to stay centered. You’re far from alone in facing this challenge, Kim. And yes, you are absolutely right, when we believe the illusion we lose our power. Being aware of this gives us exactly what we need to begin living outside of the illusion.
I just loved this Dorothy.
Thanks, Debby!
Thank you for this post. I have suffered abuse in the past which has left me very broken but I am learning not to buy into that illusion.
There are tremendous opportunities for healing now, that were not readily available in the past. I hope to write more about my own personal discoveries as time goes on.
Lovely positive affirming post, Dorothy. My best to you. <3
Thank you!