Learning to find our balance again and again, is a valuable skill we practice as we navigate life’s challenges. This is especially true during the midlife years when a plethora of destabilizing happenings beset many of us. The blessing that is born as a result of our hard work is multifaceted. Sora Garret joins us today as the final guest in this segment of The Voices of Wisdom Series. In her article she describes this practice beautifully. Sora is a gifted writer with a gentle spirit whose valuable message comes through loud and clear . . . Be sure to visit her website and check out her books.
Midlife Reflections on Balance, Menopause & the Joy of Being
Sora Garrett
I’m turning 50 this year, the foundations of my life solid around me, wisdom woven deep from the rich tapestry of a half century of living. Some days I revel in this feel of solidity—the comfort & freedom it brings. Other days I am cast as water, floating in the elusive nature of things and wondering what I am to do with myself now that I’ve reached so many of my dreams.
Most of my life I’ve found fulfillment through action, the fulcrum of my life based in doing. Finding balance meant stealing time for myself so that I could keep functioning as a working-volunteering mother-wife-friend-entrepreneur.
Balance was also a journey of taking myself to the extremes, testing boundaries, exploring edges to find where I belonged so I could be really happy. My outer life was in well-juggled balance. My inner life was not.
A LESSON IN LETTING GO
Eventually life crashed in around me, literally, and forced me to listen. After a major ski wreck gave me a concussion, I slowed down for a few months. The following year…different wreck, same concussion. Only this time I listened more deeply and finally ended a business partnership that was falling apart at the seams.
It was a huge lesson in letting go, and one that started me on the most amazing adventure of my life—the journey into my essential self.
I’m at least part way there, and the dance of balance is different now, though still illusive. There is less I have to do and more I want to give.
While I still have tendencies to over-do, my evolving spiritual practice keeps me well-watered and connected to my inner being. I really know what it is to overflow with giving that comes from a sincere desire to share. These days, I’m pulled (not pushed) to explore my edges so I can stay fresh & awake to wonder.
FINDING BALANCE
Rather than looking for some miracle balance point that will bring happiness, I’ve learned to shift my balance in the moment as life blossoms around me.
When I engage gracefully in this life-dance, I find a joy of being that is more fulfilling than any accomplished goal or conquered dream. And as I learn to say no to my habits of over-doing, my soul leads me to give in ever more satisfying ways.
Except there’s this one little thing: my changing body is betraying me.
Some days, I barely know myself, the heavy-fuzzy symptoms of menopause casting a dullness over my otherwise radiant world. More sensitive to almost everything, my physical balance point has become so narrow that I keep falling off. And, some days, nothing I do seems to help.
So I just keep doing what I can, showing up as authentically as I know how, and creating new rituals to support the physical changes as they come. My body has become a new learning edge that is inspiring me to pay attention more closely than ever before…to practice a new dance that will serve me as I enter this next new phase of my life.
TUNE IN TO THE SIMPLE JOYS OF BEING
I’ve discovered that even in the midst of the physical or emotional pain, when I tune to the simple joys of being…walking in the snow, getting kisses from my dogs or hugs from my family, drinking in a most amazing sunset, connecting with a friend, sitting by the fire…my balance is restored, at least for the moment.
And I’m learning that sometimes doing nothing is the best way to keep giving.
Sora Garrett is an author, mentor & life simplification guide who just turned sixty. She wrote this article ten years ago and is amazed at how relevant it still is today. While she no longer experiences the intense symptoms of menopause, her highly sensitive nature has given her a gift for helping women s l o w – d o w n to create lives of ease, joy and overflow.
With her FlowLiving® Mentoring programs, Sora will help you embrace the miraculous and find calm in chaos as you create more space in all areas of your life. Schedule a free illumination session, enroll in a mentoring circle, and find her books & blog @ SoraGarrett.com
SORA’S BOOKS
The Miracle Keys: A Conversation with an Angel
Silent Grace: A Celebration (poetry)
Coming Soon: Ignite Your Inner Star: a discovery guide & playbook for creating your most Radiant Life.
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Thanks for sharing this with your readers Dorothy!
Loved having your voice here, Sora!
Beautiful honesty here Sora. I can hear you on all fronts, specifically, ‘my body is betraying me’ which was exactly why I wrote the book, a memoir of all the not so joyful changes my body went through in menopause. One of the hugest betrayals in my life, a cruel punishment indeed, lol. But you’re right, we have to remember to be grateful for all the things we have, the wisdoms we’ve gained, and eventually learn to digest our newer selves and keep slugging. 🙂
Takes time to “digest our newer selves” but oh, the freedom!